Chapter V: Moms

After picking our way through piles and piles of refuse we come to the place where Aeris lives: the Sector Five Slums!

 

 

So beautiful. This place is alright, but doesnt have the same positive community vibe that Sector Seven did. There's stores that sell items and materia and anything you could want, but there's no central place to meet like Tifa's bar. Oh well. There is also someone important who lives here besides Aeris:

Yes, the guy are pretty sick:

Look at that guy. He's majorly messed up. He was discovered somewhere around the slums and all he could say was "uuuugggg" and "aaauuugg" but the good people of Sector Five got him off the streets and gave him a home inside this tube. All that we really know about him is that he has a tattoo of the number two on him, and that some people call him "The General." Won't you help him? Well..youre no doctor.

 

I've always wondered who's trophies those were too.

 

Well, lets get on over to Aeris' house and drop her off.

Whoa, are we still in the slums? Nice house, Aeris. Look it's got a waterfall, plants that are actually growing from the ground. And the house itself looks like it's made from for real building materials, not scrap metal and feces. Maybe we can get a nice home cooked meal or a nap in a real bed inside.

 

Just as nice on the inside as it is on the outside. That's Aeris' mom, Elmyra. Looks like she's a bit of a worry wart. Lighten up already, mom. Aeris is 22, she can take care of herself; she has a big ol' metal rod she can beat bad guys around with. Elmyra is a nice person, though, and invites us to stay the night for our troubles. Aeris says that tomorrow she's going to show us the way back to Sector Seven to pay us back for our bodyguard work. Elmyra gets all worried again, but concedes, saying that once Aeris decides to do something, she'll do it anyway. After the conversation Aeris goes up to make the beds, but before we can follow her, Elmyra stops us to make a request:

She is SOOO worried. She's mostly wary about Cloud having formerly been in SOLDIER, and I guess it's understandable why she wouldn't trust people involved with Shinra.

 

I guess this the last we'll be seeing of Aeris. She's a nice girl, but we dont want her to get hurt either. Well, le'ts rest up and prepare for the journey to Sector Seven.

 

Snore snore. As Cloud sleeps he has a dream of his mom.

We can see where he gets his hair from. During the dream she tells him that she'd like for him to have a girlfriend to help him out in the big city of Midgar. Cloud is reluctant to talk about relationship issues, as a lot of people are with their moms. Understandable. After the dream Cloud wakes up and quietly creeps out of Aeris' house to avoid disturbing her and let her know he's leaving.

 

I know you're scared, and rightly so, because the road to Sector Seven is pretty dangerous. I dont want to have to go alone either, but it's the position we're in and we just gotta make the best of it so lets set and and be brave and WWHHHAAAA??!

How'd she get there? Looks like Aeris is coming along with us no matter what anybody says. Cloud says he doesnt approve but I think he's a little relieved she's going with us.

 

Here it is: the terrible, twisted, nightmarish labyrinth that is the road to Sector Seven.

I swear you could catch tetanus by just looking at this place. Look at all that debris! So much. And along with all that sharp and rusty garbage are houses that decide to kill you. They are pretty terrible and weird:

I don't know why there are houses attacking. We just gotta go with the flow. After you beat up on them enough they get really mad and dead things pop out of them:

Ahhh! Scary! I don't like this guys, lets get the hell out of this place and back to safety. But wait! Just now we're able to use Aeris' limit break for the first time:

Unlike other characters, her limits generally have to deal with healing and curing and stuff like that. This limit is called "Healing Wind," and it fixes up the wounds Aeris and Cloud. Thanks Aeris!

 

Pretty soon we escape the scary, garbage part of the road, and make it to a playground in the middle of Sectors Six and Seven. Just a little farther to go, but why not take a break here for a bit?

What in the world is that thing theyre sitting on? Cloud and Aeris chat for a while, and Aeris reveals that she had a former boyfriend who was also in SOLDIER like Cloud. They were even the same rank, First Class. Aeris asks Cloud about this Tifa lady he's going to see, and if she's his girlfriend, which he denys. Hmmm, little romance in the air?

 

Their flirting is cut short by a big bird pulling a carriage.

Hey! Thats a chocobo! It seems to be coming from the direction of Sector Seven and heading to Sector Six (which is better known as Wall Market). Hmm. Wait, who's that on the end of the carriage?

TIFA?! That is so totally Tifa. Where is she going? Why is she in that dress? So many questions. Looks like we're gonna have to postpone our return to Sector Seven to get some answers. Follow that chocobo!

 

Well lucky you, we're visiting two slums in one post! This is the big city of the slums, Wall Market:

Now THIS is a wretched hive of scum and villainy. It's pretty popular place, and you can buy pretty much anything you could think of in this town. Tifa is here somewhere, but she's gonna be pretty hard to find in all the hustle and bustle. Lets take a quick look around and get our bearings.

This is the Honey Bee Inn. It's an amazing place. It's also a bordello Hey look, it's Johnny again! Anyway, looks like Tifa isnt anywhere around here but we did get a tip from that nice man in the suit that she might be at the Don's place. Lets go look for that then.

 

This is a big wall with some graffiti on it. I always thought it was supposed to say AVALANCHE but who knows..anyway the Don isn't around here so lets go somewhere else.

 

Even more shops! This place is BIG. No time to visit any of them now. I'm betting that big fancy building up at the top is the Don's place. It looks like a place a Don would live.

 

We go inside, and sure enough it IS the Don's place. And we find out that Tifa is inside there! But being a Don he has a bouncer thats not going to let us through. The reason why is this Don is a sexual animal and doesnt want to see anybody except for pretty girls. Aeris could go in, but alone things could get pretty..uh...rapey for her. Cloud has got to find a way through and is thinking hard how to solve this dilemma when Aeris has a brainstorm:

 

...

 

 

Well it IS the only way, Cloud. What follows is strangest adventure in any videogame before or after, and one of my favorite parts of Final Fantasy VII. Tune in next time for one big ol' gender bending fun time. 

Chapter IV: Flower Girl

When we last left our heroes, they had jumped from a speeding train and made their way through the dark train tunnels of Midgar and found a hatch which would take them to the Sector 5 Mako Reactor, AVALANCHE's next target.

 

On the way there we meet up with Biggs, Wedge, and Jessie again, who point us in the right direction through a maze of tunnels and ladders. Finally, we make to the secret entrance into the reactor, and Biggs wishes us good luck and takes off back to the base along with Jessie and Wedge. Later guys.

 

Lets get into that reactor then:

 

On the other side Cloud gets to slide down some kind of chute. It is like the most secret of the secret entrances. And the most fun too:

Wheee!

 

Everything goes very smoothly as we infiltrate the reactor. There are a few random battles here and there but nothin' we cant handle. And Tifa uses her limit break. It's called Beat Rush and she punches stuff harder than usual or something:

 Cool stuff, Tifa. Anyway, I bet Shinra doesnt even know we're here. Obviously the mission is just as important, but now we can afford some time to check out our surroundings.

Man, I'm getting some deja vu. Sure does look a lot like the Sector 1 Reactor. The only difference is a blue tint, really. I guess industrial design doesnt really need that much originality though.

Seriously, if the other reactor didn't get blown up I would swear we were in the same one. Whatever.

 

When we finally get to the reactor core, Cloud has another one of his episodes like from before, but this time, instead of a voice in his head, it's a full on hallucination. This is what Tifa and Barret see (reality):

Which is just Cloud freakin' out and holding his head. Maybe we can see a little more why Barret doesnt trust Cloud all that much. Crazy guys and big bombs dont mix all that well. Anyway, here's what Cloud is experiencing in his head:

Where IS that? We'll find out later. In this hallucination, which is from Cloud's memories, Tifa (in the cowboy hat) is holding her wounded father and appears to be very stressed out. She asks her dad if Sephiroth (who is that?!) did this too him and then declares that she hates, "Sephiroth...SOLDIER...Mako Reactors...Shinra...Everything!" and runs off. I guess we can see why she got involved with AVALANCHE now, but thats about all we find out. Cloud then returns to reality and assures his companions he's still cool and together and sane. Hrrm...maybe. Cant really do much about anything else now but SET THAT BOMB!

Blow it UP!

 

This time there's no set timer on the bomb so we can take as long as we want to to leave. It's not like there's any reason to stick around though, so we're taking off promptly, but stress free.

Goin' up the ladder...

 

Goin up the stairs...

 

You know what? Since we have all this time I'm gonna try something I've always wanted to do. See that big weird round thing with the ladder on it and the fumes coming out the top?

I've always wanted to like, stand on it, and there's a ladder there so I dont see why we cant do it. Hey, there might even be a surprise up there. Lets-a go check it out.

 

Well what do ya know, CAN get up on there!

No secrets though, I gave it a thorough search. Still, pretty cool though.

 

Having gone into the reactor through the back door, there are still some security measures we gotta hax our way through. Well, there's one, but it's really tough.

Sounds easy right? Maybe it would be if Tifa and Barret told you when they were gonna push their buttons, but they dont. Of course THEY always push their buttons at the same time, probably because theyre whispering in each other's ears, but Cloud has to guess when to push his. It's just cruel and mean spirited. After four or five tries we finally get lucky and disable the lock on the exit door. Now lets get the hell outta here and watch some fireworks.

 

Whoa were pretty high up, arent we? Look at all those buildings below. They look like factories or something. Cool. Let's leave.

 

Uh oh. This doesnt look good.

That's right, Barret. Something has gone terribly terribly wrong.

It's pretty obvious, Barret. Shinra knew all along. I guess they figure they've got six other reactors besides this one, and they'll be able to still turn a profit. The whole thing was a trap that Shinra let AVALANCHE set for them, and now our heroes might die in an explosion of their own making. And look at this, the man behind it all even showed up for the occasion:

Barret takes this opportunity to tell the President off for killin' the planet. The President doesnt really care though, he has to go to dinner. Cloud also asks the President if he remembers him. The President recognizes that Cloud was in SOLDIER, because of his eyes (another thing that will be explained later) but the only member of SOLDIER the President remembers is the brilliant, perhaps too brilliant, Sephiroth (who IS that?).

 

Well, presidents are busy men, so he jumps into a nearby helicopter and sends in the brand new Shinra Techno-Soldier (TM) to do his bidding and detain our heroes until the reactor blows up and they all get blown to bits.

 

Guess what? IT'S OUR SENCOND BOSS FIGHT!

beep boop

 

As said before, this is the Techno-Soldier, and he reminds me of a vacuum cleaner. It's not as tough as you would think a Techno-Soldier would be, nor as raving. Basically Cloud, Tifa and Barret take turns beating on it until it just can take anymore and it...

 

Explodes and puts a big hole in the walkway that Cloud was standing on! Our hero is now holding on to projecting debris for dear life:

That's not his only problem, either. That reactor is going to explode pretty soon, and when it does he's gonna be knocked back and fall down into the urban chasm below! Is this the end for Cloud?!

The bomb detonates and the reactor goes up in flames! BOOM!

 

Cloud loses his grip and falls! NOOOO!

 

Is this the end? What's going to happen to Cloud's spikey butt? Right after the fall the screen goes dark, and we are treated to this conversation, presumably going on in Cloud's head:

 

 

Very strange. But we do know that Cloud survived the fall, and that is a relief. Let's open our eyes and find out just where we landed.

Whoa! It's the flower girl again! That is quite a coincidence (or is it?) It's in this church where we are finally properly introduced the Aeris Gainsborough, probably the only Flower Seller in all of Midgar. She has type O blood, is 5' 3" tall and 22 years old. How about that, one year older than Cloud. This is what she looks like in battle:

What's she doing in this church though? I'll tell you. She hangs out and grows flowers here, even though it is believed that nothing grows in Midgar, period. That's weird. She also mentions something about some Materia her mother gave her that doesnt do anything. This girl is full of mysteries . Cloud converses with her a while and they get to know about each other a bit:

You know, I've never actually picked the one that says "You're the slum drunk," but I've always wanted too.

 

While Cloud and Aeris are chatin' it up, some unwanted guests bust on in:

Shinra is just everywhere today, arent they? Those storm troopers arent after Cloud this time, but Aeris. She quickly enlists him as a bodyguard and they try to make an escape out the back of the church.

 

Oh and that dude with the soldiers? He's Reno, and he's a Turk, a special secret service type division of the Shinra empire. He's also kind of a dick and steps on Aeris' flowers.

What a dick.

 

Cloud and Aeris run to the back but the Shinra goons are hot in pursuit.

 Before our heroes can make it to safety the soldiers fire their guns at Aeris (why did those guys call her an Ancient?) and cause her to fall!

You said it Cloud. The soldiers are making their way down to Aeris and if Cloud doesnt do something fast they're gonna capture her and like...that's bad. What are you gonna do Cloud? Wait are those some barrels up there?

They ARE! I hope he can push them over too. Maybe they'll fall on top of those Shinra guys and let Aeris safely escape.

 

Well they do.

First one down.

 

Barrels away!

 

And thats the last one. Run Aeris!

 

Our heroes are now high above the danger and can escape out of a hole in the church's roof. Whew, close one there. Glad we all made it out safely.

 

Safe on the roof of the church, Cloud and Aeris converse a little more.

Hmm. That church looked a lot bigger when we were inside. Optical illusion I guess. Anyway, Aeris tells Cloud that the Turks have been after her since she was little. Cloud knows the Turks also scout for prospective members of SOLDIER and thinks that might be the reason theyre after Aeris. But I dunno, I think they have another motive all together.

 

Aeris asks Cloud to escort her to her home in the Sector Five Slums (I guess he's still her bodyguard) and Cloud agrees, as the slums can be dangerous by themselves, and now Shinra is probably patrolling around too.

 

The two make their way through the garbage and debris of the slums and head off for Aeris' home together. Our next save point shows up too, and so ends another chapter of the story. Next time: The Sector Five Slums, Aeris' house, sick people, and a very famous grammatical error.